Mark is Cranky

'ello kiddies. Happy Halloween. I have an idea...I've always wanted to do this. Hope you don't mind.

I have a couple of scary huge speakers. Tonight I'm gonna hook 'em up to the biggest amp in the house (which, if you've gotta know, has 200 Watts of trick-or-treater-shakin' power). The speakers will be stuck in the windows. Just as you 'lil devils start to approach (which in uber-suburbia is 6PM), I'm going to let loose with some:

If I choose carefully, you might just be to ascared to ring that bell...and I get to keep all of the candy!

This is what you'll hear:

"Sovereign" - Neurosis (Sovereign EP)

Big. Grinding. Slow. Heavy. You can almost feel those flames lighting the bottom of your costume on fire. Heck, sometimes this stuff scares me...and I'm supposed to be a grown up!

"This Is The Law Of The Plague" - Diamanda Galas (Plague Mass)

The booming, foreboding drums. The chanting. The recitation of Leviticus. Galas' terrifying, otherworldly voice.

I wouldn't ring that doorbell!

"Symphony No. 1 (Third Movement)" - Glenn Branca (Symphony No. 1 (Tonal Plexus))

A pile of electric guitars hammer and bow away at a single E chord. Some dissonant horns drop in to push the weirdness over the edge...and to add a two-note repeat that brings to mind a siren announcing the end of the world.

"Disturbing The Priest" - Black Sabbath (Born Again)

Ian Gillan at his most evil. Tony Iommi ripping shards of metal blasphemy. This ain't Avril Lavigne. It is a little upsetting...especially if you're seven years old. You still want that candy?

"Ballad Of Dwight Fry" - Alice Cooper (Love It To Death)

The sound of a man going insane.

I...GOTTA....GET....OUTA HERE!!!

Creepy.

"Careful With That Axe, Eugene" - Pink Floyd (Ummagumma)

Classic rock's psychedelic slow-burn to insanity. It made those neck hairs rise the first time I heard it...when I was sixteen. Wonder what a second-grader dressed as Sponge Bob will think?

"Black Angels" - Kronos Quartet (George Crumb) (Black Angels)

Subtitled "Thirteen Images from the Dark Land", this is one frightening chunk of music. Like a good horror movie, just when you think things have calmed down...the entire quartet shrieks back to life. If I heard this blasting from a window I would turn around and go home back to my nice, safe Playstation.

Happy Halloween Kiddies.

"Head Bussa" - Lil Scrappy

In a nightmare I had (because I ate a slice of pizza too late that evening) my parents (70-something and 80-something) have had their 1996 Buick Sky...

Oh, sorry...I thought this was Trillville.

They were both produced by Lil Jon. It shows.

"Neva Eva" - Trillville

In a nightmare I had (because I ate a slice of pizza too late that evening) my parents (70-something and 80-something) have had their 1996 Buick Skylark converted into a low-rider. Trillville's "Neva Eva" is what they listen to as they bounce their way down the street on their way to mom's next chiropractic appointment.

Seriously, if I feel the need for hard core rap, I'll bust out The Chronic.

There's nothing here (they do yell "Neva eva" a lot though).

David S. Ware felt it was time to focus on his abilities as a composer. As he puts it:

"I didn't want to make another quartet album with everybody blowing - there are enough records with me blowing my brains out"

Now personally, I love it when Ware blows his brains out. Just check out "Lexicon" from Go See The World. That...is some serious blowing. There's some meat on it. While it doesn't cross the line into, say, Peter Brotzman territory, it does build up a good bit of skronkology.

The selections on Threads are nothing like most previous Ware Quartet material. First of all, the instrumentation is not what you'd consider typical for jazz with the addition of viola whiz Mat Maneri and Daniel Bernard Roumain on violin. Quartet alums William Parker (bass) and Matthew Shipp are here, with Shipp on "Korg Triton Pro X" (parenthetically described as: "string pads and various piano settings"). Rounding out the group is Guillermo E. Brown on drums.

So, on to the important part...what's this all add up to? Well, not Charlie Parker with Strings. Not Sketches of Spain. Not even Variants On A Theme Of Thelonious Monk. No, what Ware has put together is a collection of meditations on his own themes. New ones. Each track presents a slowly unfolding theme. As that musical base material is repeated the other instruments support it, react to it, and feed off of it. It may take a while for the whole story to reveal itself, but it's worth the wait (and the 'trip' itself, is interesting). Oddly enough, this music reminds me of a collideascope. The theme defines the basic shape early on, and then the secondary instruments move in to change the colors.

Oh...those 'themes'? I didn't mean to suggest that Ware's tenor is responsible for stating them. Not at all. On the opener "Ananda Rotation" it's Parker's bowed bass along with the strings. On "Sufic Passages" it's Parker's bass alone. "Weave I" begins with drums. And the closing "Weave II" is kicked off by Ware's sax.

By scattering the timbral center of each tune, Ware has managed to create a suite of music that keeps the listener in suspense. The ear is waiting for a repetition of an earlier 'situation' and is 'disappointed'. And that's a good thing. For music fans with a lust for new sounds, this is food.

The title track is a pure string ensemble piece that's the most classically-oriented selection. In many ways it reminds me of Gorecki's Symphony No. 3. That's a good thing too. The slowly building and evolving theme, while a model for the album as a whole, takes on a very elegiac nature when presented by the strings alone.

I want to say that this is now my favorite David S. Ware record...but playing favorites is tough when you're dealing with such dissimilar material. Let's just say that Ware's need to focus on his compositional talents is a big success. It'll be interesting to see where he goes from here.

"The Dust Blows Forward N The Dust Blows Back" - Captain Beefheart (Trout Mask Replica)

This song wouldn't feel out of place on Harry Smith's Anthology of American Folk Music. Part field holler, part rambling genius.

Well I put down my bush 'n I took off my pants 'n felt free The breeze blowin' up me 'n up the canyon Far as I could see

I dunno, sometimes weird things just resonate with me.

And if forced to make a desert island records list, Trout Mask Replica would have to be on it. You can listen to this thing once a day for a year and still not "get" it all.

the amazon comments on this are universally negative...which of course means i've gotta get a copy of it.

all the naysayers hate the covers too. but i'm intrigued by the idea what what Vernon Reid can do with AC/DC's "Back In Black", and the Beatles' "Tomorrow Never Knows".

Oh yea, i'm there!

it is so stupendously beautiful outside. the bright sun, the leaves.

ok, everybody leave work...right now!

"Just So You Know" - Holly Palmer (I Confess)

At first I was sure this was just another generic dance track. The straight ahead beat is complemented by an echoey piano that reminds me of what goes on in Alanis Morisette's "Thank U"...in a Bjork-y kinda way. Then the first verse brings on a pleasant, breathy vocal style. Nice, but nothing to get upset about.

But the second verse...hmmm...I can't quite believe I'm saying this....sounds like Rickie Lee Jones doing a spoken word R&B thing:

somebody over there at the counter in the diner on the corner in the corner of my mind wears your face on a different day i'm someone else too and we disappear together we fold up and fly away like paper airplines we rub each other's creases and line up each other's angles and we choose the brightest papers and we fly...

Now, maybe Rickie Lee wouldn't have gone into that "crease" stuff, but the fact that somebody from the dance/pop world can put together lyrics like this...well...heck, maybe it doesn't mean anything.

It is cool though.

And, get this: Holly digs Bukowski. Check out this chunk of Interview magazine:

After stints on the New York lounge circuit and as the back-up singer for David Bowie, Plamer took a break from music and enrolled in an acting class. There, she says, she began to discover how better to put her feelings into words. The experience gave way to her latest album, I Confess (Warner Bros.), an inventive hip-hop-inflected collection of songs about loss and betrayal on which Palmer puts no punches. "If I write about what's going on in my life, there's no need to apologize," she says. "It's like what Charels Bukowski said: 'What matters most is how well you walk through the fire,' because in hell there's going to be lot's of it."

Pretty danged sassy, if you ask me.

I'd love to tell you when I Confess is going to be released, but it appears to be a moving target. Her website'll probably have more info.

"My Joy" - Leela James (A Change Is Gonna Come)

This tune starts off on the right foot with a slinky Lauren-Hill-type vibe....and I love the guitar. Clean-toned and funky.

But then the voice hits with:

Who are you to tell...that I can't go on....without you?

...and I've got to say that this is some voice. Supply and sexy with just the right amount of smokey edge.

Let's just say that it got my attention.

I wish more modern r&b went this route. There's a lot of soul and funk here, with reverence to the past that's not bleached out by too many passes through ProTools.

Sadly, there appears to be no Leela James material on the near horizon...or else Warner's keepin' it a secret...which would be a shame.

Leela James' Website

Nothing new here. We've talked this one to death. But an item in the local newspaper (The Boston Globe) about a Dj celebrating his 30th year on the air was just plain depressing:

"We live by research now," Wright says. "If research dictates that this set of songs tests well, then those are the songs we play. Back then, we went on record sales, and on occasion the DJ could play his favorite. Right now, we really don't have that freedom."

I know that this is true, I just hate to read it. And it gets worse:

He adds, though, that he would be hesitant to advise newcomers to choose a career in radio. "It's changed too much. There's really no one left who is willing to teach these young guys, and some of these young guys are not willing to learn. You can make as much money working at McDonald's when you're starting out. But if you're willing to pay your dues and hone your craft and take direction, you can make a living out of this business."

Hone your craft? Really?? There's creativity involved in making a computer send out the next entry on the predigested playlist? Here's the final straw:

Wright credits his longevity to his willingness to follow his own advice. "Keep your mouth shut and behave yourself. Just go with the flow: Take direction and roll with the changes, 'cause the changes keep coming," he says.

Yes, do keep your mouth shut...because the board of directors and the market researchers have taken over.

...and radio is dead.

Rush In Rio - Rush

Good gawd! Another live Rush album. It seems like only yesterday that Different Stages came out.

Well, this one is not just another live record. It documents the final show of the Vapor Trails tour.

And what a show it was: due to driving rain at the previous night's show in Sao Paulo the load-in was several hours late, forcing them to take the stage without a soundcheck. Somehow, magic happened. The sheer force of the crowd's enthusiam lifts the performance to a higher level. The Rio fans were just plain crazy. You can hear them singing along to the instrumentals! Yessir, during both YYZ and La Villa Strangiato those folks are screaming their brains out. Pretty danged exciting.

...and a great way to start the weekend.

A guy I know often accuses me of being unendingly positive in my reviews.

...which of course totally misses the point.

And the point is? Well, for the moment I'll just say that it's more than giving a thumbs up (or down) to a recording. First, a little background.

Like most teenagers, I got the music bug in high school. This was the late 70's. Everybody had the bug. The new Blue Oyster Cult record came out...everybody got it. We drew the band logos on our book covers. Over and over again. This stuff was important.

It went far beyond just buying records for me. I started cultivating my inner music nerd around the same time. Any rock publication I could get my hands on I would ingest. Cover-to-cover. Sometimes twice. Crawdaddy and (later) Kerrang, music articles in Time, Newsweek, People Magazine, the local paper. Anything....but especially Creem and Rolling Stone. They were my bibles.

I had a collage on the back of my bedroom door. The usual stuff. Photos of rock stars, band logos, Farrah Fawcett, etc. The collage had a border around it made of the little albums covers clipped from the record reviews in Rolling Stone. I tell ya, there was a lotta paste and paper on that door. And I spend a lotta time starin' at it.

Yep, I was a rock nerd. Remember the night of the keg party in the movie Dazed And Confused? I would have been in the station wagon with the nerdy redhead and her geeky cohorts. No doubt.

One of the things that really stuck with me about my early love affair with music was the absolute sense of joy & wonder upon discovering something new and delicious. The first Van Halen record comes to mind. It was almost like winning the lottery. This cool...thing...it just drops into your lap. It makes your life better and asks nothing of you in return.

As far as writing reviews goes, it's something that to me, a sixteen year old kid, looked like a glamorous job. If you couldn't actually be a rock start, this seemed like the next best thing. Heck, some writers truly seemed like rock stars (Lester Bangs for sure). The job also (to me) looked impossible. I was no writer back then. I knew it.

After college I easily managed to avoid the only-listen-to-what-I-liked-in-high-school-or-maybe-college thing. Yep, the fever was strong. I also got interested in record review anthologies (just in case I missed something, I suppose)...and the first one I bought was The New Rolling Stone Record Guide. While the book exposed me yet again to tons of music (feeding that never-ending musical bloodlust) it also drove home the fact that some writers can be just plain nasty.

This is something that's always bugged me. I'm not talking about saying, for example, that the latest Lou Reed album is sub par. No, that might actually be useful (or at least interesting) information. The nasty review is the one that basically says "I Hate This Band...I've always hated This Band...their fans Suck...and, by the way, their latest record sucks too". Wow. So impressive. Here's an example from the afore-mentioned Rolling Stone Guide. It's a short 'review' of all of Jonathan Edwards records, each of which gets the dreaded 'black box' rating.

The most unctuously dumb of all the hippie singer/songwriters. His hit, "Sunshine" (on a now-deleted Atco LP), sells what he usually does - peace and bliss in the country, contempt for anyone who's not following along. It's the best of a truly miserable body of work.

That 'review' was written by Dave Marsh. The guy definitely has an encyclopedic knowledge of rock history, so I do have some respect for him. But...that is some nasty writing. Oh yea, the 'black box' rating is defined as: "Worthless: records that need never (or should never) have been created. Reserved for the most bathetic bathwater".

Sorry, that kind of writing just isn't for me. It seems like a pointless task to review a style of material that you've never liked. Heck, even if I don't particularly like a genre, it's more fun (and interesting) to try to relate to it. There just might be something good in there.

Ok, now that I've spouted off about why I'm such a fricken' egalitarian, Zen Buddhist-type reviewer, let's try a 'practical' example. I've had a couple of CD's sitting around here for a while that I just don't know what to do with. They come from the world of smooth jazz...definitely not my thing.

The first record is saxophonist Kirk Whalum's tribute to Memphis soul, Into My Soul. It starts off with the strong (and very Steely Dan-ish) "Do You Feel Me". With a great rhythm guitar part and a playful melody line, it's a loada fun. A happy tune. After that things get a little too happy. Not enough soul, too much programming. But...a big surprise on track number 6: "I Loved You In Memphis"...a great ballad with guest vocal from Isaac Hayes. Things heat up on a funked up "That's All Right" featuring Kevin Whalum on vocals (Elvis this is not...but still good). The rest of the album is just a little too happy for me. Maybe if I knew more about the Memphis soul sound this'd resonate more. Dunno.

Next up, Esperanto, by trumpeter Rick Braun. The first problem is that there's just too much programmed percussion. It sucks the life out of the music...which is too bad because there's a fantastic break a short way into "Green Tomatoes"..with a snazzy guitar solo flying above some tasty funk rhythm guitar. But then it's back to the regularity of straight, programmed 4/4 (with the accent on the 1 and 3 where, as Jerry Garcia once said, even a white person can find it). "Latinesque" begins with a beautiful, echoey Miles-ish trumpet that unfortunately gives way to more 'rock solid' percussion. It's sorta like a Sade record if you substitute a trumpet for the vocals....and it's a little frustrating to the instrumental music fan in me: I can hear the good parts, but they're not allow to breathe.

So there, not exactly four-star ratings for those records. But no name-callin' either. And, who knows...maybe somebody'll pick up one of these things and they'll be started along their own road to fan-dom (or obsession, take your pick).

It could happen.

My first 'jazz' record? Chuck Mangione's Feels So Good.

"The Only" - Static-X (Shadow Zone) In The Mini-Listen #5 I made a slight error.

The lyrical theme should have been described as "my-life-sucks-because-somebody-was-bad-to-me-a-lot-i-hate-everything".

Phew! This stuff is cold.

Maybe I'll give Jewel a second chance.

Yea, I'd like to see that too...but that's not today's topic.

Yesterday, I borrowed a copy of Jewel's 0304 from my sister. Having heard not a single note from this record (but having read lotsa reviews) I figured, well, can it really be that different?

Yep, it is.

One question: what the hell happened? It sounds like a Madonna imitation. A bad one. Icky.

To make things worse, my car is in the shop...so I was listening to this stuff while driving through the subdivisions in my rented suburban-assault-yet-soccer-momish Pontiac Vibe. Help!

So I got to work and immediately popped an antidote into the my computer: Bikini Kill's The CD Version Of The First Two Records....to cleanse the palette, so to speak. There's nothing like all that screaming lovingly accenting a bit of "Give Peace A Chance" ("Liar").

"Numb" (The Video) - Linkin Park (Meteora)

See, this is where record companies really miss MTV. This video (which came as an extra with my "Numb" promo cd single) is pretty damned cool. The storyline follows a teen girl (who's an artist) trying to fit in with society...and having a hard time of it. Bits of video showing the band rocking out are interspersed with the 'movie' bits.

Back in MTV's heyday they were a force to be reckoned with and had the cultural leverage to shove a band out into the spotlight. Too bad that music on television has mostly disappeared (there is M2, but who watches it?) While I didn't particularly like the song "Numb" on its own, the video managed to bring it to life. And while these DVD giveaways might get kids buyin' more CD's (though I have my doubts), there's no substitute for a video channel that's always on and is always part of the music fan experience.

"Numb" - Linkin Park (Meteora)

This kind of "modern rock" does nothing for me. Even if I was able to ignore the ever-present my-life-sucks theme (which is pretty danged tough to do) the music alone would drive me away.

Start with a little Nine Inch Nails-esque intro bit, slip into the lighter part of the first verse (which on "Numb" sounds like Depeche Mode) and then smash into the chorus...full of crushing, down-tuned guitars. Now repeat this for several more go-rounds, then finish up with the Nine Inch Nails thing.

Have people's attention spans dwinded so much that they can't remember the Reznor sound? Gees, it was only a coupla years ago.

icky, massive, nasty headcold goin' on here. i can't type because my forehead smacks into the monitor.

boo hoo.

Ok, this may not be as weird as finding out that Elvis Costello and Diana Krall were gonna tie the knot...but it's close.

A short article in the Ideas section of the Boston Globe is saying that Thomas Pynchon is going to make a guest appearance on an upcoming episode of The Simpsons.

Simpsons writer and executive producer Al Jean confirmed in a recent interview with the entertainment website IGN.com that Pynchon will indeed play himself on a show in the new 15th season, whic begins next month. In the episode in question, a novel by blue-coiffed homemaker Marge Simpson wins endoresements from Pynchon and airport-novel writer Tom Clancy, among others. According to Al Jean, the cartoon version of Pynchon will be wearing a paper bag over his head.

My oh my, what will Harold Bloom think?

Read the full Globe story here.

"Drain The Blood" - Distillers (Coral Fang)

Oh yea! Actual rock music. There's some chunky, Fu Manchu-esque rhythm guitar, active & supportive bass and...a bridge where everybody drops out so that the intro riff can set the tone for an honest to goodness guitar solo! What a rare thing these days.

The 'funny' thing about this tune is that the chorus is so much fun...while the lyrics:

All my friends are murder All my bones are marrows in All these fiends want teenage meat All my friends are murderers

...are not.

Zoot Allures - Frank Zappa

Two reasons:

1. "The Torture Never Stops"

2. I don't have a record with a song titled "Grady Little Is Fricken' Moron".

"Another Postcard" - Barenaked Ladies (Everything To Everyone)

I'm sure these guys are talented musicians...but I just don't get 'em. There's been so much positive press about them that I always wonder "Is It Me?" Nope. It's just not working.

The only song of theirs that I've come close to liking is "It's All Been Done" (from Stunt), which reminds me of XTC's "Peter Pumpkinhead". And every time I hear a Barenaked Ladies song I'm reminded of the silly yodeling on the Focus' "Hocus Pocus"....especially when they do that "white-guy-sorta-rap" thing. Come to think of it, that's what happens when I hear They Might Be Giants.

Everything To Everyone comes out on October 21st. Get it if you don't remember who Focus was.

Oh well.

"Lupra" - Steve Tibbetts (Man About A Horse)

Ya know, I might even dig Yanni if he added tablas to his music. Ok, that's going too far. But one of the most interesting elements of this recording is the cool interplay between the percussion and Steve Tibbetts' guitar. Tibbetts as a guitar player is pretty tough to categorize. He likes to take samples and guitar music...and toss 'em in a blender. What comes out is pretty much unlike anything you've heard before. I heard an interview with him once where he described his approach to music and how he enjoys tweeking sound samples until the original source is mostly "gone". That's what's fun about his music. All these fresh sounds wrapping themselves around & between the acoustic and electric guitars. Let me use a high falutin' music critic adjective here: eclectic.

Every so often I get a huge pile of musical 'stuff' on my desk...CD's, singles, articles, reviews, notes scribbled down during the drive home, etc. It all goes into my music 'in-box'. To be 'processed' later.

Well, now's the time. The pile has grown too large. So, here we go with a new series I've dubbed The Mini-Listen.

"Talk To Me, Dance With Me" - Hot Hot Heat

The next step beyond the 'new' garage rock movement? Successors to The Strokes, The White Stripes, The Hives, etc? Man, this tune really reminds me of the New Wave era. Maybe it's the Robert Smith-like vocals. The snarky Gang Of Four-ish guitar line doesn't hurt either. And geez, is that a synth I hear? The rhythm section is fun too (I'm a sucker for a great guitar riff).

Does this style work in a full album context? I just may have to find out.

It was defintely a beautiful weekend downeast. The foliage was spectacular, the skies bright blue. Everything a person could ask for.

But there was also some weirdness going on:

Late Friday night, while at a convenience store counter waiting to buy a couple of sodas, a totally drunk woman (who in addition to being drunk was upset and crying) steps in front of me to ask for (actually, it was more of a demand) a pack of Marlboros...but it sounded like "erwannapacka...marlbrssss....now!)...this of course reminds me that I do not miss my days working for Cumberland Farms
In the middle of a huge crowd of people I saw an old man sitting on a curbside bench, head in his hands....a very dirty feather duster sitting next to him.
Across the street from my hotel's parking lot there was a huge iguana soaking up the sun from a second story window.
On the way home we passed a general store whose sign read "Guns....Wedding Gowns...Cold Beer". We didn't stop (though probably should have).

I was doing a little web-surf this morning to see what other people thought about the Fresh Air/Bill O'Reilly thing. Most of the usual stuff came up. Conservatives thought he was set up, liberals laughed at the narcissist flipping his wig.

But the funniest page was easily Larry Flynt's National Prayer Day.

HUSTLER Magazine invites you to join us in prayer. On Tuesday, August 5th at 12:45pm, we have organized a special gathering to pray to God for Fox News Channel blowhard Bill O'Reilly's death. The service will be held in Los Angeles at Cornerstone Plaza, 1990 S. Bundy Drive. Located on the corner of Bundy Drive and LaGrange Av e. DISCLAIMER: This serious gathering will truly take place, however if O'Reilly dies, it must be God's will. For more information, please contact: Sean Carney 323-651-5400 ext. 7361

Too danged funny, that Mr. Flynt.

Glamoured - Cassandra Wilson

Ooooh baby...Just one listen to Wilson's gorgeous & sultry voice intertwined with Willie Nelson's classic melody from "Crazy" is enough to make me think things I just shouldn't be thinkin'!

Glamoured doesn't stray far from Wilson's past styles...with some originals and some covers, all done with that sparse & full of air combination of bass, acoustic guitar and voluptuous voice. But hey, she can ride that style from here on in. I won't tire of it.

Phew!, it's gettin' hot in here.

"SERVICE ENGINE SOON". Ok, it's not as bad as the your-oil-pressure-is-low-your-engine-is-cooked light, but it's still a pain in the butt. The owner's manual says that it might be related to the exhaust/emissions system. The car will still run...but you should get it looked at as soon as possible.

Fine.

So...I call the dealership and, amazingly enough, they can look at it. No appointment necessary. What the hey?! I ain't complain' tho...so I get down there and the guy with the red shirt takes down my information, takes my keys, and off I go to the waiting lounge.

It does take a while (nearly two hours...but I'm still not complainin' because it's a beautiful day out there, I've taken a day off of work...and I'm happy (or at least hopeful) that my car will be 'fixed' before our Columbus Day weekend drive up the coast of Maine).

A little later the guy with the red shirt comes out with the service receipt in hand plus the good news: The charge is $0.00...because the gas cap was loose! Geez, I'm all worried about having to replace some big 'ole expensive part and instead my danged gas cap was loose! Since when does "SERVICE ENGINE SOON" mean "YOUR GAS CAP IS LOOSE"? (ok...I do know the reason, but still...)

Look, I'm not complaining about technology in general (though I have been known to indulge myself there). Heck, technological advancements in areas like medicine and aeronautics have been nothing short of amazing. Where there appears to be a lag though, is in the area of gas cap loosy-tighty detection. To be fair, even an advanced loosy-tighty detector probably wouldn't have been able to diagnose my car's problem...which was that the rubber safety strap that used to be attached to the gas cap had been severed and had gotten itself wedged underneath the cap itself, causing the less than perfect seal.

Foiled by a little rubber flappy-doodle.

Oh yea, so while I'm waiting there in the lounge I thumbed my way through this business magazine (can't remember which) and happen upon an article about this guy whose job is to convert pop tunes to cellphone ringtones. Interesting job, I thought. Then I get to this eye-popping stat: his company has sold 1.8 billion ringtones! Yow! Ain't technology grand?!

So, what have we learned today? That technology can be both grand and silly. That sometimes things can turn out better than expected...and that people are spending insane amounts of money so that "We Are The Champions" will 'ring' on their cellphones.

What a world.

i for one am glad there is no red sox game tonight.

why?

because i just can't take it!!!

We all know what "hooks" are in pop tunes. But...how to describe them? The memorable part? The chunk that get's your moneymaker shakin'? I dunno...but this weekend I came across a fantastic description:

Any point in music in which you feel like you've arrived at a place of relief or well-being or familiarity or all of these. A Place like home. I'm not an avid radio, jukebox, disco or MTV listener but there are often bits of these songs which will immediately, psychoacoustically meld with my nervous system. The reason may be melodic, timbral, rhythmic, textual, dramatic, or even just temporal, but the hooks are where the hits hit. My referent at Billboard magazine has a tendency to utter the cliche, "there's a reason you can hear why each of these songs became hits." I think it's true. Each really successful song, above and beyond markeing insinuation, has sonic viral elements, or hooks, which get inside you and stay there and become part of you. The virus is emotionally-laden information. When you hear one of these elements again you get emotionally engaged and your body sings along so even if some sociologically-oriented part of your mind is saying "i hate this song," your body will ecstatically sing along with Debby Boone in "You Light Up My Life."

And there you have it. Sonic viral elements....wish I had come up with that one.

Hats off to John Oswald: the man who brought you Plunderphonics, Plexure, and also the wonderful Dark Star-o-rama that is Grayfolded.

For more thought-provoking reading on music, get yourself a copy of Arcana: Musicians On Music. A great collection of music essays (edited by John Zorn). Brain food of the highest order.

It made me want to listen to Muddy Waters, Koko Taylor, Pinetop Perkins, Howlin' Wolf, Public Enemy, Pete Cosey-era Miles Davis, and anything else I own on the Chess label......all at the same time.

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